friday how-to: the eternal pick-up line!

tired of the negative reactions you get from women? try the automatic pick-up line! guaranteed to work with any woman, anywhere, anytime.*

using our simple, patented fill-in-the-blank method, nearly any verb can be turned into a pick-up line, simply by inserting it into the following sentence and using the proper inflection:

"i'll _____ you!"

the pickup line works best when it flows naturally with the conversation at hand. for example:

lisa: "i'm baking cookies."
charlie: "i'll bake you!"

personalize the line further by adding an appropriate qualifier, as in:

margo: "i need to get some laundry done today, it's really piling up."
charlie: "i'll do your laundry!" or, even more creative, "i'll pile you up!"


call 1-900-pick-me-up to get our instructional dvd! and call in the next 20 minutes to receive the FREE bonus verb booklet, with dozens of verb ideas for your pick-up-line enjoyment.

never spend a lonely night again. call today!
1-900-pick-me-up

*any woman, anywhere, anytime guarantee only applies when the technique is used correctly. injuries resulting from slaps, kicks, or other physical or verbal abuse as a result of using this method, cannot be the responsibility of 1-900-pick-me-up. use pick-up lines at your own risk.

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ok, it's kind of amazing, the things you come up with while stuck in traffic for hours after a very long and tiring day, especially when you're dying of hunger. i tend to get a bit loopy, and strange things get very funny...